Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess