I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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