Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
