i barfeds in our rink
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
