Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
