I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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