The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
