I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
