just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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