I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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