Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
