She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I came so hard my ears popped.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
