Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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