Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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