He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
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I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
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It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
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