i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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