My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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