Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
COCAINE IS GR8
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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