The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
