My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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