matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Randomize