U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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