just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I just gargled with NyQuil
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
