omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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