Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You made out with two different species that night
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
