omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
