70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
No I am not eating basil off your cock
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize