THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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