Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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