When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
