We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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