Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
