i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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