He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
