I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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