College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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