This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
