I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
