my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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