Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.