i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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