I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Randomize