Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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