You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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