Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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