If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
