went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
so much tequila, so little girl.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
my liver is dry heaving
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
