nut hugger
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
