I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
