I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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